Equal partnership in marriage

HUSBAND AND WIFE have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3).
Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.

THE FAMILY is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.

WE WARN that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.

WE CALL UPON responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society."

Here is The Family-  A Proclamation to the World put out by the First Presidency and council of the twelve apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What a powerful inspired document. These are men of God. Called upon  by the Lord himself to lead and guide us in these Latter days. These words provide us with the optimal way a family should operate in order to achieve the most happiness in this life and the next.

I know as men and women we have divine roles, just as it states in the Proclamation. Women by nature are nurturers, more so than men. Men by nature want to provide and protect. These are clearly our divine roles instilled in our spirit. We came from heaven this way.  Some may argue that something about this is not fair. I beg to differ.

Chapter 3 of Successful marriages and Families  states, "Equality is all too often used to mean "identity"; this is, that two equal things must be identical to each other. Such usage represents a fallen and harmful understanding of equality that is espoused by Lucifer, who passionately wants all to be "like...himself" (2 Nephi 2:27).

 Elder Earl C. Tingey, formerly of the Presidency of the Seventy, has said: “You must not misunderstand what the Lord meant when Adam was told he was to have a helpmeet. A helpmeet is a companion suited to or equal to [the other]. [They] walk side by side … not one before or behind the other. A helpmeet results in an absolute equal partnership between a husband and a wife. Eve was to be equal to Adam as a husband and wife are to be equal to each other.”

I personally have three young children, last year my husband had health issues that caused me to have to go back to work and he cared for the children at home. This for me was an extremely hard year. My testimony of our divine roles has grown much stronger from this experience. While my husband did a good job at home. There was still a difference having me out of the home, I could also see a difference in the behavior of the children. I will be eternally grateful that I am back at home full time again and I get to be the one to raise my children full time, not miss any milestones, help them with homework, and get healthy homemade meals in their tummy's.  

I know some people have no choice and the Mother has to work out of the home. There is a statement for this situation in the Proclamation. They must accommodate for the best of the family and prayerfully decide what is right for them.